darndest things...

i was working with a speech group of 3rd grade boys, when this conversation occured:

students will be labeled as s1, s2 and s3

...i wish i could have recorded this just to get the full effect with all the articulation errors scattered throughout.  none of these boys can say their /r/, among other sounds.

s1:  mrs. menz, do you know yet what that is [pointing to my belly]
me:  this?  it's a baby.
s1:  i know.  but do you know if it's a boy or girl?
me:  no, it's a surprise.
[s2 and s3 looking at me confused]
s1:  but can you know now?
me:  yes, but we did not find out.
s1:  that's weird.
me:  welp....
s2:  hold on, are you telling me your preggers?
me:  yes, sir, what did you think this was? [pointing to my belly]
s2:  i don't know, i didn't notice. {typical male}
me:  yep.  that's a baby.
s3:  how do they get out of there anyway?
s2:  [picks up a wooden pizza cutter, holds it up] duh, they cut it out of your belly.
s3:  [makes cutting sound as he gestures that he's cutting across his stomach]
s1:  no, they don't all come out that way [getting red-faced...his mom just had a baby].
s2:  well, then how else do they come out?
me:  that's something you need to talk to your parents about.
s2:  but they won't tell me.
me:  well, we can't talk about that right now.  we have speech work to do.
s3:  do you have any idea how bad that will hurt? [using the pizza cutter to slice across his stomach].
me:  ...and i think it's time for specials, boys.  time to go!