1.12.2013

whining about weaning

i've said it before and i will say it again...

when i began my breastfeeding journey, never did i ever believe that i would make it to almost 7 1/2 months.  we had our fair share of bumps in the road at the beginning, but then practice made perfect and somewhere between 10 - 12 weeks...i couldn't have imagined it any other way.  i even made it work when i went back to work!

welp.  somewhere around 4 months, aunt flow came back to visit me monthly and the supply dropped a bit, especially when she was in town.  not only that, but little bits would get impatient waiting for it to let down.  i changed my diet a bit, hydrated and took supplements...which helped and we figured out how to get through the "dry spells"... if you will.  starting solids at 5 months helped out too.  i wasn't ready to be done and i don't think drew was either.

cut to about 6 months.  i still nursed as long as i was with her, but in the evenings the well was dry and she had a hard time going to sleep because she was still hungry.  so - i made the choice to nurse for a bit and then top her off with a bottle (1/2 formula, 1/2 breastmilk).  the result?  a little sleep machine.  she goes down no problem and she sleeps 12 hours.  this is big because this itty bitty girl has never been a champ in the sleep department.

so here's where i am today.  i nurse every morning and she seems to have plenty.  i feel "full" and she heads off to the sitter satisfied.  i pump twice a day at work (which...omg...is getting to be quite the chore) and it almost isn't even worth it.  depending on the day, i might....might get 6-8 oz. total.  but, guys...i'm still not ready to be done.

i love having that time in the morning.
i love how she loves to just chill or doze off on the boppy when she's done and full.
i love how she brushes my face.
i love how it was the best and easiest diet ever...
i love how it's free.
i love knowing she's getting the best of the best.
and i am n.o.t. looking forward to letting things "dry up"...ouch!

so here's my question.  nursing pretty much once a day (during the week) is better than nothing right?  and should i just not pump at work?  would that up the supply in the evening?  or is it better to pump frequently to keep it up?  i'm at a bit of a crossroads....hmmmm.  so that's why i'm whining.  weaning?  i don't wanna!!!!!  help wanted.

just love her.
Zzzzzz.
let's chat.


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8 comments:

  1. Skipping the pumping at work might result in more evening milk immediately-but it most likely won't last long. That would probably make the evenings even dryer. Do you have a good pump? If not, that can make all the difference with the amount you get.

    Weaning is hard, hard, hard. It's about so much more than breastmilk-it's a bond that you don't really get from anything else. Plus your hormones are going crazy from the fluctuation-which doesn't help. Just nurse as much as you want to for as long as you want. It's so individual for every mama and baby.

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    1. Thanks, Kaitlin. I can always count on you to weigh in with good info. I do have a pretty good pump...a Medella Pump 'n Style. I guess my body is just doing what it wants. And, if all we can do is mornings for now...mornings it is!

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  2. I just went through the same issue except I was to the point (after going back to work) where I was only nursing every few days. I made the decision to "shut it down" because pumping was really starting to become a pain. It was super hard and painful to slow the milk supply down but it surprisingly happens pretty quickly. After about 5 -7 days I could go the entire day without pumping or nursing. I would maybe start with pumping only once at work and wean yourself down to not all. I had two friends get mastitis when they tried to quit cold turkey - so be careful and pump if you need too.

    The physical aspect of it all is much easier than the emotional. Even though I was barely nursing I miss giving her 100% breast milk and knowing she was getting the very best. We are still doing 50/50 bottles from milk I had saved up but I am dreading the last bag of breastmilk I open. I didn't really think I would feel this way because I was so "over" pumping. But like all my friends and husband say, I couldn't breastfeed her forever! It will be tough but you have done such an awesome job to come this far! Good luck!

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  3. When I decided to stop I wast getting very much while pumping and I wasn't nursing at all. I pumped every few days for about a week and then it just dried up. It really didn't hurt at all! So there is hope.

    You have done an awesome job making it this far and when it becomes more work than pleasure it could be a good time to stop. But until then anything you can do is good!

    Good luck, you will know when it's time to stop, don't be hard on yourself when that time comes!!

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  4. I want to add that even though it's hard to let go of nursing-there are more wonderful things that await when it's over. Different types of snuggles, her finding other ways to connect with you (Hannah holds onto my bra straps while I rock her). It's ok to be sad when the times comes to wean, but there is still so much to look forward to!

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  5. It was very emotional for me too. That was the hardest part. I quit nursing on me at 4 mths but pumped until 9. Had frozen milk until 11. Did 50/50 bottles until a year. My milk supply was huge (10-15oz each time) so i felt guilty for quitting. Was pumping 2x at work, 2-4x at home. Had to plan everything around My pumping. Drew will be ok and i agree with KA, you will find other ways to bond, make time special. In terms of quitting i eliminated one pumping every few days until i was done. Wear a very tight sports bra, take some tylenol....not that bad. I did still have milk at nipple when getting into a bath 2 wks after quitting. I love all your pics of drew. She is Just beautiful like you lyndz

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  6. Hi Lyndsay - I happened to see you on Abbey's blog and thought I'd comment. I'm nursing twins and have been worried from the beginning about drying up earlier than I want. From what I've read the more you feed her and pump, the more your body will make. When pumping you should pump for about five minutes after the last drop...Oh, and I've read that going longer than nine or ten hours between pumping or feeding can make your supply drop. Once my girls started sleeping twelve hours I started pumping before I went to bed so I don't go too long between nursing/pumping. Maybe you could pump after her morning feeding and then at work and then before you go to bed? You might not get much but if your body listens it should start making more over a few days. Then again, if you can't get the supply up don't beat yourself up! You've given her the best for a long time and you should be proud!

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